Something that is constantly in the front line of my thoughts is motivation. I just can't understand how some people are so motivated and driven while I am not. Not all the time anyways. When I am doing something I love I go above and beyond. When I am doing something I love it's a feeling where I know I could do it forever and never get bored. I hear all of the time that you are supposed to do what you love. If that is the advice then why are we forced to do things that make us miserable? I am talking about college. It's tough even just thinking about the idea of not finishing college. I know it's crucial for a successful future but why? Why are we forced to go through 4 years of what I feel like is hell, for a piece of paper? Most people that are successful and happy aren't doing what they thought they would be doing and certainly not what they went to college for. Granted there are those select few who go to college, get a degree, and stay with that for the rest of their life. That is their problem.
I am about to say something that might make some people squirm. I HATE SCHOOL. There I said it. I absolutely hate it. It's not that I hate learning, because I don't. I love learning new things. I just hate the idea and situation of college. You learn based on how one person wants you to learn. It's about their homework, their tests, and their lectures. Granted I am beyond stubborn. Once I get this idea in my head it stays there. But I really just cannot get past this. It has consumed me for the last week. It's all I think about.
If college is supposed to be beneficial to me and something that I need then why is it so painful? It's not that I am not good at school. I have always been an A and B student. I don't put an effort into any classes though. I know it is because I don't enjoy any of the classes.
This is really just a huge rant and I don't know where I am going with it other than to get the point across that I hate college, or maybe I have the wrong degree path. I don't know.
End of rant though. Thanks for reading if you made it this far haha.
Semper Fi<3
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
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